2011 Ruby Quotes

2010-03-05 dressup1

In 2008, shortly after she began talking, Steve and I started capturing Ruby’s funny quotes in a Twitter account (@areyoubewhy if you’d like to follow it). Here are the tweets from 2011 – all are her exact words.

When I grow up I’m going to make a restaurant and it’s going to be free there to get stuff. You should name it Rainbow Point Restaurant. 1/2/2011
You’re not crazy. How many times do I have to tell you you’re not crazy? 1/12/2011
Roller derby’s better than soccer! The best thing that I like about roller derby is that they skate. 1/16/2011
I’m an alien who can turn into a vampire. I have alientalk powers and haunted powers. 1/26/2011
I wish my stuffed animals would come alive. I’m going to watch and see if it comes alive. Why isn’t it alive? 2/1/2011
I’m pretending to be God. 2/6/2011
Hoist! Hoist the contraption! 2/14/2011
You don’t want love up your nose. It’s just like water. 2/15/2011
I’m the Aerialista Princess of Lions. I’m the special-est. 3/6/2011
Soon, you should take away all my games on the iPad and replace them with MATH GAMES. I’m going to be Math Girl. 3/7/2011
Pancake fluff is such a fun material. 3/8/2011
I’m a very focused child. I focus on what I’m watching. I only like Cecelia’s silly words. I never talk out of turn. 3/14/2011
It’s a dew drop fairy day! And you’re my dew drop daddy. 3/23/2011
When I grow up I’m going to be a math teacher during the day and a rock star on the weekend. 3/26/2011
Do you think robots could be teachers? Like, they could say somebody’s name and beep if they’re right. That would be cool. 3/28/2011
They must think we’re idiots. 4/8/2011
Some of these people are too pretty to be smoking. They’re going to start as Princesses, then be jokers, then garbage men, then trash. 4/8/2011
I love you as much as garbage stinks. 4/10/2011
Out of all the rainbow colors, my most favorite of my favorite colors is blue. And red. And yellow. 4/12/2011
I counted to a thousand today. At naptime. In my head. And it was longer than that, naptime was. 4/13/2011
I-6 is just a little harder to drive on [than I-5]. It’s a setting. 4/15/2011
I’m going to rename my fort to Butterfly Bakery Attack Watchout. It watches for spies. 4/18/2011
West Seattle is really a country, a lot. Because it’s west of Seattle. 4/25/2011
Papa, are we upside down right now? 5/1/2011
These shoes feel great. They make me look six. And this feels like a six-year-old dress. 5/5/2011
I think when Evan grows up, he’s gonna steal things. 5/14/2011
NO! It’s NOT a race! And I’m going to win. 5/28/2011
I’m actually the princess robot. 6/8/2011
Aaaah it’s a slug! AND IT’S LOOKING AT ME! 6/19/2011
[Completely out of the blue, without context:] Vacuum or motorcycle: which one wins? 6/19/2011
I was being sarcastic. 7/7/2011
Papa, what if someone doesn’t know what sarcastic means? 7/7/2011
Four to two!? I can’t believe it! #seattlestorm #doesntgetbasketballyet 7/10/2011
Cotton candy turns into air so I don’t often eat it. [picture] 7/10/2011
I am greatly disguised! [picture] 7/16/2011
Oh! Mama, Oong Goonggoong texted me. She says, “Where are you?” 7/29/2011
They put a straw in my drink to make it look grand. 7/31/2011
I’m gonna be five things: an artist, a builder, a sailor, a dancer, and a person that works at a hospital. 8/3/2011
Whenever I burp, the sparkles go up my nose and it really hurts. 8/6/2011
I’m Lava Sister. I live in a volcano! Want me to shoot a volcano in your face? 8/8/2011
(Singing) Time heals aaaaanything … except if your leg’s chopped off. 8/12/2011
A lotta knots go into contraptions. 8/20/2011
I’ve always longed to dress like a ninja. 9/4/2011
If you don’t believe me, I’m going to do some weird, annoying dancing. 9/13/2011
What can I lick other than everything else? 9/16/2011
(singing) … alcohoooollll … come to Paaaapaaaaaa…. 9/17/2011
I’m a bulldozer of Amazons. 9/23/2011
The blood is very poisonous in ninja pumpkins. So I have to clean it up right away. 9/30/2011
I’ve got a pattern I want to draw. I really need to get it out of my head. 10/9/2011
Guess who my favorite family member is (besides Mama and Papa)? Smoke Detector! Because Smoke Detector keeps me safe. 10/25/2011
I don’t usually say what I’m thinking. That’s how you win. 11/8/2011
Whenever I hear “contraption” I get really excited. ‘Cuz I MAKE contraptions! 11/15/2011
I’m going to keep my mouth open *all* night. 11/20/2011
Gentle whimpers come from sad animals. 11/22/2011
Mama, what’s the best part about the world? Math. Math is the best part of what you have to learn. It’s the most important part. 11/22/2011
Something I know about skydiving is: always clean up after your skydiving. 11/22/2011
All the little kitty will do is spelunk in your heart. It’s looking for love. 11/24/2011